Jeff & Konnor's Blog

Oh local news, how we love you. Local news is almost always useless and oversensationalized, but this is just plain ridiculous. Yesterday evening, the only local news we can stand to watch, KSL, reported that "Some Energy Drinks Contain Alcohol." Quote:

"Would you know? Richard Nance [of the Utah County Division of Substance Abuse] lined up different energy drinks to show us why he is concerned. Most on the market do not have alcohol, but a few do. But all of them look alike."

Um, huh? Check out this picture of "energy drinks" they used. See how they all look alike? How would you know? Hmmm, how about the "4% Alcohol by Volume" written so clearly on the bottle that you can see it in this fuzzy photo the news provided? How about the fact that the drinks containing alcohol are sold in the beer aisle? How about the fact that any idiot knows that Mike's Hard Lemonade and Captain Morgan's Parrot Bay Malt Beverage are alcoholic, and nobody would ever confuse them with energy drinks?

We're feeling a little sluggish right now, so we're going to do some shots of whiskey. Should perk us right up.